March 17th 1997, at the age of 26, was the first time I seriously tried to stop drinking.
Having drank since about the age of fourteen, alcohol had been a constant and welcome part of my life.
Alcohol was not my problem, it was my solution.
The problem was I never learned how to deal with life on life's terms.
As the saying goes, I didn't know what I didn't know.
I had no idea that I was numbing myself emotionally with alcohol.
Alcohol had always just been part of my life and that was that.
I think around the time I entered college was when I really starting drinking alcoholically.
That is to say, I pretty much drank every day of the week.
Let me also say, that how many times a week I drink has nothing to do with whether or not I'm alcoholic.
It's the thinking that goes with it.
Even when I wasn't drinking, I was thinking about drinking.
It is called the mental obsession of an alcoholic.
So getting back to when I stopped drinking in March of 1997.
Let's just say that I went through a horrible detox from alcohol and was hospitalized for several days.
This scared me enough to swear off alcohol forever.
I went a little over six years without having a drink of real alcohol.
I say "real" alcohol, because I did drink non-alcoholic beer from time to time.
That may not sound like a huge deal, but for a recovering alcoholic, it's the "thinking" that gets us in trouble.
By drinking non-alcoholic beer, I'm still clinging to the idea that I want to drink.
So for all these years I wasn't drinking alcoholically, I was not actually treating my alcoholism.
I am truly alcoholic, so if I'm not effectively treating my alcoholism, I will drink again.
So after six years the day came when I decided I could have a glass of wine.
Within a few months I was drinking as much or more than I had been back in 1997, which was over a fifth of vodka a day.
Alcoholism treatment means different things to different people.
Alcoholism is considered a disease; therefore, if you have been diagnosed as alcoholic, you must treat it as such.
After several years of drinking again heavily, it was taking a terrible toll on my well being; physically, mentally, and spiritually.
I made a few failed attempts here and there to stop or control my drinking, but as the saying goes for alcoholics; I can either control my drinking or enjoy it, not both.
On March 12th of 2006 I had reached a bottom.
Faced with the realization that my life was completely unmanageable, I considered suicide.
Luckily, I decided to try and treat my alcoholism one more time and entered rehab for the third time in as many years.
That was almost four years ago and I haven't had a drink or mind altering drug since.
Today, treating my alcoholism means so many things.
Recovery is not just something I do; it's a part of who I am.
I like to think that every morning I wake up with untreated alcoholism.
By following a rigorous recovery program, I'm living a life today that is better than I could have ever imagined.
My alcoholism treatment program consists of three things I've learned through the program Alcoholics Anonymous and I practice each and ever day: trust God, clean house (morally), and help others.
Having drank since about the age of fourteen, alcohol had been a constant and welcome part of my life.
Alcohol was not my problem, it was my solution.
The problem was I never learned how to deal with life on life's terms.
As the saying goes, I didn't know what I didn't know.
I had no idea that I was numbing myself emotionally with alcohol.
Alcohol had always just been part of my life and that was that.
I think around the time I entered college was when I really starting drinking alcoholically.
That is to say, I pretty much drank every day of the week.
Let me also say, that how many times a week I drink has nothing to do with whether or not I'm alcoholic.
It's the thinking that goes with it.
Even when I wasn't drinking, I was thinking about drinking.
It is called the mental obsession of an alcoholic.
So getting back to when I stopped drinking in March of 1997.
Let's just say that I went through a horrible detox from alcohol and was hospitalized for several days.
This scared me enough to swear off alcohol forever.
I went a little over six years without having a drink of real alcohol.
I say "real" alcohol, because I did drink non-alcoholic beer from time to time.
That may not sound like a huge deal, but for a recovering alcoholic, it's the "thinking" that gets us in trouble.
By drinking non-alcoholic beer, I'm still clinging to the idea that I want to drink.
So for all these years I wasn't drinking alcoholically, I was not actually treating my alcoholism.
I am truly alcoholic, so if I'm not effectively treating my alcoholism, I will drink again.
So after six years the day came when I decided I could have a glass of wine.
Within a few months I was drinking as much or more than I had been back in 1997, which was over a fifth of vodka a day.
Alcoholism treatment means different things to different people.
Alcoholism is considered a disease; therefore, if you have been diagnosed as alcoholic, you must treat it as such.
After several years of drinking again heavily, it was taking a terrible toll on my well being; physically, mentally, and spiritually.
I made a few failed attempts here and there to stop or control my drinking, but as the saying goes for alcoholics; I can either control my drinking or enjoy it, not both.
On March 12th of 2006 I had reached a bottom.
Faced with the realization that my life was completely unmanageable, I considered suicide.
Luckily, I decided to try and treat my alcoholism one more time and entered rehab for the third time in as many years.
That was almost four years ago and I haven't had a drink or mind altering drug since.
Today, treating my alcoholism means so many things.
Recovery is not just something I do; it's a part of who I am.
I like to think that every morning I wake up with untreated alcoholism.
By following a rigorous recovery program, I'm living a life today that is better than I could have ever imagined.
My alcoholism treatment program consists of three things I've learned through the program Alcoholics Anonymous and I practice each and ever day: trust God, clean house (morally), and help others.