If you want to save your marriage, it's time to get real with yourself.
You have to take a hard look at what your marriage has become and what it's really going to take to fix it.
This is where many couples give up and head for the divorce attorney.
But the good news is that even if your wife said she wants a divorce, there is still hope.
You can start to fix your marriage even if she doesn't seem interested.
Here's how to get started.
1.
Put the divorce out of your mind for now.
Sure, your wife said she wants a divorce, but if you are more interested in saving your marriage, you need to not think about the end result being divorce.
Even if your marriage does end up that way, you want to be able to say that you tried everything you could to save it, right? So that means you have to stop arguing with your wife about the divorce.
You want to make your marriage better, and that means concentrating on saving it.
2.
Make a list of how you could change your marriage for the better.
When it comes to saving your marriage, having concrete goals are going to help you.
Write out the things you would like to change, and create a timeline for changing them.
Do you want to spend more time with your family? When could you start? Would you like to go on a family vacation? What is the timeline for going? What do you see your family looking like five years from now? What goals would you like to reach by then? Anything you can get a jump on now, get started.
If your wife sees that you are changing things for the better, with or without her help, she will be more likely to believe you and become more interested in saving your marriage too.
Concrete changes will help you change her mind about the divorce more than empty words ever will.
3.
Try your hardest not to fight fire with fire.
Your wife might still want a divorce and not like the fact that you don't.
Resist the urge to get nasty with her, even if she starts yelling that she will get the divorce whether you want one or not.
You are showing her that you are changing, and that means not arguing and fighting all of the time.
It takes two to head down that road.
If you don't give her the reaction she wants, it will force the two of you to change your patterns.
Be as nice and cordial as possible, and continue changing the things you can change.
Eventually she will start to look at your marriage differently.
She won't be able to help herself.
And the more she can see you as the man she fell in love with, the easier it will be for her to want to save your marriage too.